Have you seen this article on CNN?
Why I Raise My Children Without God
Are you appalled? I’m appalled.
No, it’s not the content. This is seriously an awesome article. The author has managed to articulate, clearly and concisely, exactly what’s in my own head and heart. Actually, what’s in a lot of people’s heads and hearts. More than you probably realize.
So, what’s so appalling? That readers are flagging it as “inappropriate,” that’s what.
I’m so tired of this – this notion that so many religious folks have that we non-believers should just keep our non-belief to ourselves. There is nothing – absolutely nothing – inappropriate about that article. No profanity, no sexual content, no hate language, no threats or intimidation, no promotion of violence or illicit activity. It merely explains, in plain terms, why this mother is raising her children without god, without religion. Why is that “inappropriate”?
I’ve experienced this too many times myself, being told that my outspokenness about my non-belief is disrespectful of those who are Believers, that my views are unwelcome. Only recently a commenter here said, “(The Whole God) issue is like a beaten horse. We all know how you feel, don’t you think it is time to tap into something else?”
Why is it that it’s perfectly acceptable – commendable and encouraged even! – for Believers to proclaim their beliefs, to issue forth their faith, to quote bible verses and loudly thank Jesus for every little thing – in life, on Facebook, on blogs – their own and other people’s – at every turn, but if an atheist is open about his or her non-belief, they are admonished?
I’ll tell you something: probably the number one reason I talk about my views on faith as often and openly as I do is because I am inundated with Christianity all the time. (I’m starting to think that I live in the “Bible Belt” of California.) The Christians in my life – both real and cyber – have no qualms about sharing their faith, whether invited to or not – all the time. I want equal air time, it’s as simple as that. I talk about it because you talk about it; I talk about it to counteract what I’m surrounded by. I doubt I would have much to say on the topic if Christianity weren’t so woven into the culture and community of which I am a part.
If a parent somewhere submitted a similar article to CNN titled “Why I Raise My Children With God” instead of “without,” it’s highly unlikely that anyone – not even an atheist – would have the gall to flag it as “inappropriate.”
I commend the author of that article for putting her thoughts out there. Fortunately, she’s getting a lot of support, but she’s also getting flak. I think what she wrote scares people. What if everything she says is true? They must think that, at least for a second or two.
What a great post!!! I was just telling D tonight that I have no idea what I believe! D is Jewish and I am seeing Christians in a whole new way.
Great post and I can’t wait to read more!
Sounds like you live behind the Orange Curtain, where free will goes to die. Don’t drink the kool-aid.
Yep.
I love that you speak openly about atheism. Somehow if you don’t believe in a god, you are immoral. How many immoral acts have been committed in the name of a god throughout history??? I am a moral, ethical, kind and giving person who strives to make my corner of the world just a little bit better because I choose to. Simple as that. Isn’t that more impressive and powerful than laying it all on a higher power??
I didn’t love the article you refer to for the following reasons. First, once again, very judeo-christian centric. Second, no mention of science. Trying to debate whether god is fair or not is besides the point. Gods were invented by societies to explain things they didn’t understand about the world (how many people still believe Zeus creates lightening?). We now know the truth about how the world works thanks to physics, math and biology. We don’t need to invoke higher powers any longer.
Sue, my impression is that the author was addressing Christianity specifically for the same reason I do – because Christianity is mainly what I’m inundated with. While there are Hindus, Muslims, and Jews scattered in my community, they’re not trying to influence me, my kids, or public policy. And as far as not bringing science into her article, I think she was just trying to specifically address the supposed reasons so many Christians believe that children SHOULD be raised with god – because god is kind, god is merciful, god will reward them, blah blah blah. Anyway, that’s what I took away from it.
Thanks so much for pointing my attention to this article. I generally avoid mass media outlets; their ‘if it bleeds, it leads’ news judgment usually brings me information I don’t need and often encourages biases that are inappropriate and sometimes outrageous.
But this is a great article.
My personal spirituality is deep and my spiritual practice extensive, but I agree with every point made by TXBlue08. The “God” I was taught about in grade school doesn’t make a lot of sense to me. The idea that God is loving, all-knowing, all-powerful, and good doesn’t match up well with what I see around me in the history of just the last hundred years, never mind what happened before that (even as described by the victors).
I also was taught, in grade school, that nature was “red in tooth and claw” — that ‘survival of the fittest’ was a competition for scarce resources, that it was a ‘dog eat dog’ world — as a matter of ‘scientific knowledge.’ (Note the absence of the acknowledgment that actual science consists of ‘theories’ and ‘observations’, not ‘truths.’)
But my personal observation is that we live in a generous and giving world. The apple tree only needs two or three daughter trees to ensure the survival of its next generation, but instead of just setting a few seeds, it produces thousands of apples, thus feeding the pigs, the deer, the chickens and the people. There are hundreds of examples of that throughout the plant and animal kingdoms.
I don’t need a concept of ‘God’ to teach my children to be ethical people, to treat one another fairly, to study and work hard and make relationships deep and satisfying. I also don’t need to pretend that any of us could ‘know’ that there is no ‘God.’
From my personal perspective, nothing I can say would convince anyone of the existence of the Gods and Goddesses with which I find myself in daily communion; until and unless you have your own experiences, you won’t believe me. But once you have your own experiences, nothing I say will reshape them anyway. Similarly, nothing anyone can say will convince me that what I am experiencing is false.
I heartily agree that religion is a personal and private matter, and should be kept out of the public sphere. We can act from our principles, of course, and some of those may certainly be taught by religion. But none of us should impose our religious ideas on others.
I didn’t mean to go on so long — it’s your blog, after all. Thanks SO much for boosting the signal for TXBlue08′s CNN post.
I think people are flagging it because they feel attacked. She’s just sharing her view, but because she’s stating it as fact it will get people upset.
Thanks for the link to the article. I wouldn’t have found it otherwise.
We are not religious, nor do we plan to raise the kids to be. It’s been a non-issue so far; many more of our friends here in the midwest go to church but I haven’t had any issues with my honesty in our choices. It’ll be interesting as the kids get older, though, and make their own friends and begin to understand that we make a different choice than many of their friends’ families do.
Thanks for the link. I live in Canada, where I’m guessing that god/religion isn’t emphasized quite as much as in the US, but I am continually amazed by the number of people who still ride this train. I wish people would stop foisting everything off on a STORY, and take responsibility for ourselves, each other and our world.
Christianity, Mormonism,etc are more about oppression + psychological manipulation than the existence of a God. This type of behavior is just par for the course.
I think people are finally waking up to that and realizing they can access God (or maybe just what they’ve been conditioned to perceive as being attached to the existence of a God ) outside of man-made religion. I really think that things will look a lot different ten years from now.
Really great article, I love the narcissism bit.
Also, this post made me think of the oatmeal’s ‘how to suck at your religion’ comic: http://theoatmeal.com/comics/religion
Oh my god, I’m dying! That is priceless!! “Boner demon” – HAAAAAA!!! Must share . . .
As a Christian I shouldn’t have qualms talking about my faith and you shouldn’t make me feel bad about that. It’s a part of my life. As a mother of a child with Down syndrome, I shouldn’t have qualms talking about DS to parents who have typical children. They have no right to make me feel bad about that either. It’s a part of my life. If you don’t want to hear it – don’t be friends with them.
I’m not sure what your point is, or maybe you’ve misconstrued my point. Christians DO talk, openly, and it’s acceptable. When non-believers talk, though, we’re generally told, in one way or another, to keep our views to ourselves.
I agree!
I talk about my lack of faith because many Christians have this idea in their heads that Atheists are angry and evil. I’m a 31 year old mom who lives in Suburbia, and I’m neither angry nor evil.
I can’t understand why you would flag something as inappropriate. If you have to live in a world where the only views you are exposed to are the ones you already hold, why would you ever venture onto a secular website to begin with?
Obviously I meant the universal you, not you the author of the blog. Oops.
Very good point Lisa. I wonder how people like The Duggars, who are over the top with their beliefs (I do believe this is a cult, not a religion), end up with a TV show! People praise these freaks yet their daughters are now going into their 20′s and are not permitted to date, go to college and will be expected to carry on this cult/religion. If that’s not disturbing I don’t know what is.